Re: Like a Kid in a Candy Shop.

Mayor Bloomberg has been on television all afternoon declaring a state of emergency and the snow hasn't even started yet. Every time I see him on television, I re-realize that he must be the shortest mayor in the history of the world. Every public school in the five boroughs is already closed for this impeding storm tomorrow, and I've got my snow gear out and ready to go.

The most entertaining part about a snowstorm that supposed to be SO BIG, is how people in the suburbs react; they freak out as if this were Florida and not the north east who has seen its fair share of snow. Of course, if that wasn't enough, each television station puts some dim-witted correspondent in every grocery store or Home Depot within fifty miles to ask questions like: "How are you getting ready for the storm?" to people who are buying large bags of salt or have a cart full of gallons of water. It should be noted that there is no Wonder Bread left on any shelf in all of New Jersey...yes, this is what the news is reporting. Damn, I should really get out there and buy some before we run out in NYC, too!

I loved snow days as a kid: waking up to see the snow all over the ground, and running downstairs in the hopes of seeing whether or not you were lucky enough to get a school cancellation, or at the very least, a considerable delay. I'm not sure why companies don't practice this whole closing down policy in the snow, but they really should. Think about how happy your employees would be if the mere potential of a snow day existed?!

The last really big snowstorm was the second year I lived in New York, and the one before that was way back in college. The snow drifts were so deep that we couldn't open the door to our apartment, so we made some pancakes, got dressed up in snow pants, crawled out our window and ate our pancakes on the porch, our asses slowly getting numb from the snow. The campus shut down for three days during that storm, and it would be five days before we could open the door...why shovel the snow that was kind enough to barricade us inside for days? Because we were drunk on Smuttynose and pancakes for days, that's why...oh, and we didn't have a shovel.

I'm secretly hoping that someone's company will lose power tomorrow so I can have a playmate for the snowstorm. Yeah, that's kinda selfish, but I've never said I wasn't...and they say admitting it is half the battle...or something...

Waiting for snowstorms makes me write about clowns, of all things...