Everyone:
I’m noticing an annoying trend with you people…it seems that I can no longer send out an email regarding the basics of this office without the majority of you responding with some pointless, mundane and unwitty response. This morning I sent out an email to merely remind you energy wasters to shut off the lights whenever you exit the sample room, kitchen, and/or bathroom; and that's where things could have ended, but no. Instead I got a whole slew of stupid responses. In no specific order, they were as follows:
“Lame email.”
“AW AW AW.” (I'm assuming this person was trying to phonetically type out the noise she always makes)
“Jokes on you when someone steps on the dog in the dark and someone sues your ass.”
“I hate you.”
“What does ‘inundate’ mean?”
; )
"I think you spelled the word 'light' wrong."
“I still hate you.”
Seriously, your responses are weak and pretty much suck. Pick up a book by Oscar Wilde, learn the art of wit, then come back at me when you have something worth typing. Oh, and this might be a grand time to point out that smiley faces are pretty much the bane of my existence...just like that LOL shit. Granted, I have like 1,000,000,000 banes, but such is life for a misanthropic in training. Thanks in advance.
"Wit is educated insolence."
- Aristotle.
Ms.Paunts.
10 comments:
It's actually spelled "oooah oooah".
ooooooooaaaaah
ooooooooaaaaah
Ms. Paunts in my office I warn my coworkers of any emails I have to send to every employee and before it is sent we have a pool as to who will respond first with any of the following:
1) an inane comment
2) a stupid question
3) an unrelated question
4) a missive on why my email is unnecessary and has nothing to do with work.
The winner gets exclusive mocking rights to that person for the day.
I realize your mocking skills are above mine but it does help to pass the time and helps bond my office together against the mindless hoards.
oooah oooah!!
Mandy, I don't know how you can stand it - this new office is nothing like the old office. Not one person has eaten a non-food object for money. There haven't been any scandalous after work events where someone hooks up with an intern. I felt like Jennie Klein was making out with everyone in sight, and now all that is gone. You were like Pam from The Office and you once had a Jim, but that's gone too. You may need to get a new job somewhere else if you want to maintain the same level of entertainment that you once had. I'm just being honest, not mean. I'm not a mean guy.
Amen, they are a bore. Put some ex-lax in their double pump, no whip half calf extra gay latte and spice things up in that place a bit.
oooah ooah
i love you
<3 cunty
write a new blog entry
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